THE MYSTERY OF CONFESSION
We must recognize that we all are broken and are in need of grace, understanding, and compassion. We learn that we must stop judgment of others and ourselves. In the community of the church, we learn to share our weakness and to shed our tears, to love and to be loved. We recognize that we do not have to be perfect for people to love us.
Fr. Tom Tsagalakis
The Mystery of Confession: God's Gift of Healing
While Holy Communion stands at the very center of the Orthodox Christian life, and defines our belonging within the Body of Christ, the Mystery of Confession finds us at what Archimandrite Meletios Webber calls "the outermost layers of our Christian life." Here, at the threshold between estrangement and withinness, we encounter one of the most profound paradoxes of our faith: in admitting our brokenness, we find healing; in acknowledging our distance from God, we discover His closeness; in confessing our sins, we experience His forgiveness.
​Confession could well be called the Mystery of Forgiveness, since forgiveness remains mysterious in our world of transaction and exchange. We live in a society that tells us that everything must be earned and comes only at a price. Yet in Confession, we encounter something that defies this worldly logic: completely free forgiveness, requiring only that we ask for it with sincere hearts.
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In an age of increasing secularization, this concept of receiving without earning is quite countercultural. As John Chryssavgis observes, secularization isn't merely an external force but even "acts from within the Church," leading even active church members to sometimes approach confession as an obligation or a duty, rather than a transformative encounter.​​
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The Nature of True Forgiveness
In our fallen world, what is little more than a pragmatic calculation often masquerades as forgiveness. We say we "forgive" at the point where pursuing a grievance simply becomes too costly in time, energy, or resources. This worldly forgiveness is fundamentally transactional—a cost-benefit analysis dressed in moral garments. We forgive because the math works out in our favor, because maintaining the conflict has become more burdensome than letting it go.
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Sometimes we even wield forgiveness as a subtle instrument of self-aggrandizement. We position ourselves as the magnanimous party, the one taking the high road. Our very act of forgiving becomes a way to claim moral superiority or to craft a narrative that casts us in a favorable light. We forgive to maintain beneficial relationships, to preserve social connections, to tell ourselves a flattering story about our own virtue. In this way, even our acts of mercy can become exercises in self-interest.
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Christ's forgiveness stands in stark contrast to these worldly imitations. His is a forgiveness that flows from pure love, expecting nothing in return. He accepts our brokenness, our failures, our perpetual stumbling, without demanding that we first prove ourselves worthy. When we speak of "being the bigger person" in offering forgiveness, we glimpse only the faintest shadow of Christ's boundless mercy, for He who is infinitely greater than us continuously forgives our trespasses against Him, asking only that we turn back to Him with sincere hearts.
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In this light, true forgiveness emerges not as a transaction but as a transformation. As Webber explains, while worldly forgiveness might technically wipe the slate clean, guilt, resentment or shadows of sin often remain. In Confession, however, we receive what he describes as "nothing less than an act of love." Christ's forgiveness is not a calculated exchange but an outpouring of divine love that calls us beyond the economics of human relationships and into the mystery of God's truly inexhaustible mercy.
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A Transforming Mystery
The Orthodox Church understands sin not primarily as a legal transgression but as a wound that needs healing. As Chryssavgis emphasizes, repentance is not about inducing guilt but about realizing our human insufficiency and limitation before God. Over and over, an Orthodox Christian is reminded that, "it is good for me to cling to God, and place in Him the hope of my salvation." Confession is one way we cling to God.
Confession is not merely looking backward with regret but moving forward with hope. Chryssavgis calls repentance "a continual enactment of freedom, a movement forward, deriving from renewed choice and leading to restoration." This forward orientation means that "the past is no longer an intolerable burden but rather an encouragement for what lies ahead."
This theraputic understanding transforms how we view the very purpose of confession. As Fr. Thomas Hopko teaches, its fulfillment lies in "the genuine reconciliation of the repentant sinner with God and all men according to the commandments of Christ." This reconciliation manifests not just in forgiveness of past sins but in a new way of being, a new way of relating to God, neighbor, and self.​​​​
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​​​​What Confession Is Not
Understanding what Confession is not may be just as important as understanding what it is. It is not, as Webber emphasizes, about impressing the priest with either our goodness or our badness. It is not about paying for our sins through some form of penance, for, as he notes, "God cannot be bought by our inconvenience." It is not about feeding our ego by dramatizing our struggles, nor is it about crushing our spirit through excessive self-condemnation.
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Importantly, Confession is not about confessing other people's sins or merely complaining about our problems. As Webber points out, "The purpose of confession is to tell God (through the priest) of the sins we have committed." He helpfully clarifies that spontaneous thoughts are not sins, spontaneous feelings are not sins, and temptations are not sins. Sin usually involves doing or saying something—feeling angry is not a sin, but acting on that anger may be.
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Chryssavgis reminds us that confession isn't about "admitting, more or less reluctantly, a hitherto 'unrecognized' sin, but an acceptance of and submission to the divine Logos." We confess not to receive punishment but to return to full communion with God and His Church.
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Beyond Forgiveness
The Mystery's ultimate aim reaches far beyond the forgiveness of individual sins. As Webber beautifully expresses, "The end of this Mystery is nothing less than transfiguration." Regular participation in confession represents a crucial part of our journey toward theosis—our transformation to become more Christ-like by grace. Through regular participation in this Mystery, we gradually learn to see ourselves, our relationships, and our world through God's eyes of love.
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This transformation manifests what Chryssavgis calls the eschatological dimension of repentance. We are not merely dealing with past sins but participating in the promises of the age to come. In this light, confession becomes not a burden but a gateway to the Kingdom, not a looking back in shame but a straining forward in hope.​ It offers not just forgiveness but restoration, not just absolution but transformation, not just a clean slate but a new heart.​
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​Schedule a Confession:
To schedule confession or discuss any questions about this sacrament, please contact Fr. Tom directly. Remember, this sacred mystery is here to help you grow closer to Christ and experience His healing love in your life.​​​
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​References:
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Chryssavgis, Rev. Fr. John. "Repentance and Confession in the Orthodox Church"
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Hopko, Fr. Thomas. The Orthodox Faith, Vol. 2: Worship
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Tibbs, Dr. Eve. A Basic Guide to Eastern Orthodox Theology
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Tsagalakis, Fr. Tom. "Reflections on Confession"
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Ware, Metropolitan Kallistos (Timothy). The Orthodox Church
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Webber, Archimandrite Meletios. Bread & Water, Wine & Oil
Hope is the confidence that, despite all darkness and sin, the light of the loving forgiveness of God is upon us to do with us and for us what we ourselves cannot do.
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Fr. Thomas Hopko
​The Experience of Confession: What to Expect
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The Role of Preparation
The journey of confession begins before we enter the church. This preparation involves cultivating what Chryssavgis calls the "great understanding," a deep discernment of our true spiritual state. Over several days, we're invited to examine not just our actions but our entire way of being in the world: our relationships, priorities, and direction in life.
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As Webber cautions, we should avoid both excessive scrupulosity and casual indifference. This self-examination isn't meant to induce paralyzing guilt but to foster what the Church Fathers call "bright sadness," a genuine sorrow for our separation from God that's shot through with trust in His love and mercy. Through prayer, reflection, and perhaps reading scripture (particularly the Psalms), we prepare our hearts for this encounter with divine healing.​
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The Setting
In the Orthodox Church, confession typically takes place privately in the open church before an icon of Christ. The physical arrangement itself teaches us about the nature of confession. We confess in open church because sin affects not only our relationship with God but also our connection to the broader community of faith.
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​When you arrive for confession, you'll find yourself in what Archimandrite Meletios Webber describes as a space of absolute safety and confidentiality. The priest serves not as judge but as witness and wise counselor. He will be wearing his epitrachelion (stole), signifying this role in your repentance.
Father-confessor and penitent usually present themselves together in front of the iconostasis, with the priest slightly to one side. This positioning, as Metropolitan Kallistos Ware explains, physically underscores that the Confession is not given to the priest but to God who is the only judge. As Fr. Hopko emphasizes, "the Orthodox Church strictly adheres to the teaching of the Bible that only God can forgive sins, that he does so through Christ in the Church, that his conditions are genuine repentance and the promise of change which are witnessed by confession."
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Beginning the Mystery
Before the confession you will probably spend a few moments in discussion with your Father-confessor. He may want to know what sins have been troubling you in a more conversational way before you begin your confession.
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When it's appropriate, He will guide you to the icon of Christ and ask you to kneel before it. Together, the two of you will read preparatory prayers and psalms and then, when you're ready, you'll make your confession.
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Making the Confession
The actual confession involves speaking honestly about your sins to God in the priest's presence. As Webber emphasizes, honesty rather than graphic detail is what matters. This isn't about creating the blackest possible picture of ourselves or dwelling in guilt, but about opening ourselves to healing. You need not mention others by name or delve into elaborate explanations. The focus remains on your own actions, words, and choices rather than on others' behavior or on circumstances beyond your control.
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The priest listens with unjudging attention, offering what Webber describes as "empathy, and above all, his presence." He may ask gentle questions to help you gain clarity or offer guidance when needed. As Eve Tibbs notes, the priest helps "navigate the struggles of life and helps interpret the root cause of a specific spiritual problem," approaching your confession with therapeutic wisdom rather than juridical judgment.
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Some people find it helpful to prepare by writing their sins on paper. One touching anecdote Tibbs shares tells of a penitent who brought such a list: "The priest saw the paper in my hand, took it, looked through the list, tore it up, and gave it back to me. That was my confession even though I never said a word! But I felt truly my sins had been torn up and that I was free of them."​
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The Prayer of Absolution
After the confession itself, you'll continue to kneel while the priest places his epitrachelion over you. Laying his hand upon the stole, he pronounces the prayer of absolution. In the Greek tradition, this prayer takes a form that emphasizes God's action:
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“My spiritual child, you have made your confession to my humble person: I, a humble sinner, have no power to forgive sins on earth, for God alone forgives. Nonetheless, we recall that after His resurrection, our Lord Jesus Christ said to His Apostles,“If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” Encouraged by these divinely spoken words, I am bold enough to say: Whatever you have related to my humble and lowly person, and whatever you have failed to say either from ignorance or from forgetfulness, whatever it may be, may God forgive you in this present age and in the age to come.”
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"May God who pardoned David through the prophet Nathan when he confessed his sins, and also Peter when he wept bitterly for his denial, and also the sinful woman weeping at his feet, and the publican as well as the prodigal son, may this same God, through me a sinner, forgive you all things both in this world and in the world to come, and cause you to stand uncondemned before his awesome Judgement Seat. Have no further care for the sins which you have confessed. Depart in peace."
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After the Prayer of Absolution, the Confession is over and you may depart, knowing you are renewed.
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Penance or Guidance
Unlike Western practice, Orthodox confession does not always include a formal penance. As Webber explains, while the priest may offer guidance or suggest spiritual practices or particular Scripture readings, these are not understood as payment for sins. They serve instead as medicine for healing, aids for spiritual growth, and practical help for avoiding similar struggles in the future.
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Rhythm and Frequency of Confession
While confession is particularly appropriate during fasting seasons and before major feasts, its deeper rhythm flows from our ongoing need for healing and renewal. Orthodox practice varies regarding how often one should confess. Some traditions encourage confession before each communion, while others, particularly where frequent communion is practiced, may not require this.
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What matters isn't maintaining a rigid schedule but developing what Chryssavgis calls "an attitude which colors one's whole life," a continuing openness to God's transforming grace.
Confession is always an opportunity for renewal and deeper communion with God, but the Mystery is particularly necessary when we feel burdened in our sin or when our spiritual growth has become sluggish or might benefit from a reprioritization. Your spiritual father can help you discern what pattern best supports your growth in Christ.​​​
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Schedule a Confession:
To schedule confession or discuss any questions about this sacrament, please contact Fr. Tom directly. Remember, this sacred mystery is here to help you grow closer to Christ and experience His healing love in your life.​​​
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​References:
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Chryssavgis, Rev. Fr. John. "Repentance and Confession in the Orthodox Church"
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Hopko, Fr. Thomas. The Orthodox Faith, Vol. 2: Worship
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Tibbs, Dr. Eve. A Basic Guide to Eastern Orthodox Theology
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Tsagalakis, Fr. Tom. "Reflections on Confession"
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Ware, Metropolitan Kallistos (Timothy). The Orthodox Church
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Webber, Archimandrite Meletios. Bread & Water, Wine & Oil
Repentance is the renewal of life. It is not a looking backward but moving forward and leaning forward towards Jesus. This means we must free ourselves of all our negative traits and turn toward absolute Good, towards Christ.
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Elder Thaddeus
A Life of Repentance: Beyond the Moment of Confession
The Journey Continues
The Mystery of Confession doesn't end with the prayer of absolution. Perhaps one of the most beautiful aspects of Confession, as Webber describes, is that it "recreates the innocence we had when we were lifted out of the baptismal font." However, unlike the rebirth of baptism, "which can be experienced only once, the rebirth of confession...is available as often as we require it." This "ability to start over is a great blessing" which, in time, gives us "a tremendous amount of freedom to come to terms with the person we really are."
Through confession, Webber continues, "we receive forgiveness for sins we have committed in the past, but we are left with the experience we have acquired." This combination of true forgiveness and increasing wisdom shapes our ongoing spiritual journey. It's what Chryssavgis calls "a way of transfiguration, in which man's heart and mind continuously receive illumination by the Holy Spirit."
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Repentance, like salvation, is therefore not a moment or a stage we pass through but, as Chryssavgis emphasizes, "an attitude which colors one's whole life." It requires ongoing struggle yet remains fundamentally a gift of the Holy Spirit who transforms the heart. This transformation manifests in practical ways: renewed participation in Holy Communion, restored relationships within the community, and what Hopko calls "a sincere attempt by the penitent to refrain from sin and to remain in faithful obedience to God."​​​​
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Joyful Sorrow
In Orthodox tradition, genuine repentance often manifests through what the Church Fathers and Mothers call the gift of tears. These aren't tears of despair but what Chryssavgis describes as "penthos"—a "worthy suffering" transformed through grace into "joyful sorrow."
This paradoxical experience captures our sorrow over our separation from God while simultaneously celebrating His mercy in drawing us back to Himself. Tears of joyful sorrow mark a frontier between the grief of estrangement and the overwhelming joy of reconciliation. They demonstrate, as Chryssavgis notes, "a pledge of return, and a firstfruit of its joy."
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Webber points to the parable of the Prodigal Son as an example of this "pledge of return" - icon of authentic repentance and its aftermath. Surprisingly, the son who leaves, sins, and returns proves spiritually mature to the brother who never strayed. The experience of being lost and found transforms him, elevating his understanding of love and forgiveness. This pattern repeats in our lives each time we participate in the Mystery of Confession - we don't merely return to where we were but arrive at a new place of deeper understanding.
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Responsibility and Freedom
Through regular confession, we learn what Chryssavgis calls "a forward movement into life." This movement involves clarifying our understanding of responsibility. As Webber notes, we often exhaust ourselves trying to change others while avoiding responsibility for our own growth. The burden we carry is paradoxically both smaller and larger than we imagine: smaller because it encompasses only our own actions and choices; larger because it touches everything within our personal sphere.
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"Often," Webber says, people "shrug off responsibility, preferring to be responsible in other people's space, but declining to be responsible in our own." He say that the degree to which we avoid taking responsibility for that which is actually in our control is a "dance of dazzling proportions" which "leads to an inauthentic lifestyle and the further misery of the human race." The stakes are high, indeed.
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Thankfully, regular participation in confession helps us "come to terms with our own responsibility and see it in its rightful context." As we return in humility to Christ, over and over, and seek his true and loving forgiveness, we begin to better understand our place—and His—in God's great creation.
Authenticity and Connection
While confession itself is always private, its effects ripple through the entire church community. As Chryssavgis reminds us, "Sin itself is a relational act—a break in the 'I-Thou' relationship." Therefore, reconciliation with God necessarily involves reconciliation with other people and with the Church. Outside of community, repentance could settle into what he calls "guilty gloom." Within the Church, it becomes a journey of healing shared with others.
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Confession also fosters what Webber calls "an authentic lifestyle." It helps us gradually close the gap between our curated, tidy public persona and our messy, human inner reality, between how we present ourselves and who we truly are before God. This growing authenticity allows for deeper relationships with both God and our brothers and sisters.
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Ultimately, as Chryssavgis emphasizes, repentance has an eschatological character. It realizes in our midst, here and now, the promises of the age to come. Looking backward would mean sharing the fate of Lot's wife. Instead, repentance orients us toward the future, toward what Webber calls "the person God created us to become."
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This journey continues throughout our lives. Through it, we learn to live what Chryssavgis describes as "the eternal mission of the Church," returning again and again to Christ's words and example, and discovering anew what it means to live the life of the Spirit in our contemporary world.
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Schedule a Confession:
To schedule confession or discuss any questions about this sacrament, please contact Fr. Tom directly. Remember, this sacred mystery is here to help you grow closer to Christ and experience His healing love in your life.​​​
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​References:
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Chryssavgis, Rev. Fr. John. "Repentance and Confession in the Orthodox Church"
-
Hopko, Fr. Thomas. The Orthodox Faith, Vol. 2: Worship
-
Tibbs, Dr. Eve. A Basic Guide to Eastern Orthodox Theology
-
Tsagalakis, Fr. Tom. "Reflections on Confession"
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Ware, Metropolitan Kallistos (Timothy). The Orthodox Church
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Webber, Archimandrite Meletios. Bread & Water, Wine & Oil