The Great Reset

Finishing up this chapter of my life, I've had the great opportunity to shed some retrospect on the past few years. My name is Anthony Sitaras and I just graduated from a public high school here in Shoreline. Throughout my educational career, I put lots of time and focus into my academics, and my musical extracurriculars. As spiritually inclined as I had been up to my Junior year, I decided I wanted to become more involved in the rest of my high school life, and slowly began to shift my focus from God to my achievements and the activities that became mainstream of my attention. I joined many clubs, taking on leadership and responsibilities.

At first, it was great. I'm the type of person who loves having something to do, so I was happy that I was being productive. As time went on, however, I began to get the impression that maybe I took on more than I could bear. I became frustrated with those around me, and I allowed pride to come in and take over. I put Christ in the backseat, and went on to "bigger things" as I had thought. All of a sudden Matthew 6:24 became true to me. "No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other" (NKJV). The logismoi I had learned about in Orthodoxy 101 now infiltrated my mind in a different way. I stopped caring so much about my relationship with Christ and really wanted success in the other areas of my life. I didn't realize it, but the devil had sneakily shifted my focus and love for Jesus to that of Earthly passions. It slowly ate away at me until I found myself questioning God's existence and my entire moral code.

After performing in a concert one night, I sat in the parking lot of my school and just took a minute to reflect. At this point I was waking up at 6 A.M., having a jam-packed day, and going to bed at 11:00 P.M. or later. Having not been able to think or pray for weeks, I didn't know what to do, but I knew I just wanted a minute. It was here that I began to realize what was going on, and knew I had strayed too far from my faith.

This happens to everyone all the time in our own ways, this was just the first time I had recognized it myself. The church teaches us to beware of logismoi, unwanted thoughts sent by the evil one to lead us away from the Lord, and now I see what really happens if you let your guard down. We will slowly stop walking the difficult path of discipline and holiness, and head to the wide path of destruction. All it takes is one thought being lazily or ignorantly accepted that can start the spiral of events to take you there. For my case, I was too busy becoming successful in my earthly pursuits to think or care about watching for these evil directions, and thank God I found myself in the pit before it was too late. I'm sure you all have stories very similar to this, so now I recognize it's very important to keep your experiences of temptation and failures near the front of your mind, and I hope this can serve as a refresher for you all as well.

I'm incredibly blessed to have this opportunity to completely reset in Pasco, but for the rest of you, please stay on your guard, and try to find a way to make changes to simplify life for yourself in your current circumstances. If possible, take just half an hour once a week for a deep reflection, and try to target all the areas of pride and self-righteousness present. Stay on your guard, and keep our Lord at the top.

"The fear of the LORD is the instruction for wisdom, and before honor is humility" (Proverbs 15:33, NKJV).

Blessings,

Anthony Sitaras

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 Originally published in the Holy Apostles E-bulletin. Subscribe here.